I've convinced myself that if I do the right thing, be the bigger person, turn the other cheek, be introspective, and try to better myself that good things will come to me.
This is not true, but I think it to be true. Then when things inevitably go wrong, I tell myself it's some sort of punishment for bad things I've done. Roomie says I grasp for straws and dig up little stuff from the past. He says I am a good guy, but I don't feel that way.
I used to tell myself that it was because I was a fatass, but then I started working out.
I used to tell myself that it was because I dressed like a slob, but then I started putting more effort into my appearance.
I used to tell myself that it was because I was a bad student, but I've gotten pretty much straight As my whole life and study regularly now.
I used to tell myself it was because I was an awkward weirdo, but I've gotten to be sociable and friendly, no longer scared of strangers.
There is still plenty of room for personal growth but all in all I am a doing a pretty good job at being a good person and well adjusted member of society.
So I guess I'm just unlucky, but that answer still doesn't sit well with me.